The Authentic You
For the past two weeks, my husband and I have been on holiday in England, Ireland, and France. I met some of the amazing people that I have talked to many times on line and it was so lovely to get to know them, finally, in person. I always wondered to myself if after meeting my online friends face to face, would I be able to say, “They are just as they portrayed themselves online” or would I say, “Wow they are nothing like what the seemed to be online!” I am happy {and thankful} to say that the #TWIPS that I have met on all of my trips, here and abroad, are just as they portrayed themselves online; warm, honest, professional, and authentic.
One may ask why is being authentic online, important? Well it may not seem important when you are just tinkering on Facebook or Twitter for fun, but when you are representing your brand you must stay true to who you are because you are your brand. In other words, you need to walk the walk and talk the talk as good as you do online, offline as well. Be who you are not who you say you are. Big difference in the two.
Being someone you are not is hard to keep up with; it goes against your true self. Try writing in someone else’s voice. It is the hardest thing to do. It is not natural and anything that is not natural is not authentic. You are essentially building relationships with people who are wanting to based on your online persona. Whatever that persona is, it should be a glimpse of who you are in real life. You do not have to tell the world everything about you but they should know that you are a real person, just like them, and not what you think you should be to get their attention. Starting a relationship, even online, under false pretenses cannot only backfire but can also cost you business.
Here is what worries me the most; it can also cost you key connections with wedding vendors who may have befriended you based on their impression of you online. Let us say you became friendly with a local vendor online, you schedule an appointment to visit with them {BTW, you should be doing that! Vendors/venues are a great source for referrals!}. On your visits, you want to be the same person you were online. Vendors will not refer their clients to you if they feel you are not who you lead them to believe, online or off. In other words, vendors will not refer clients to you if they do not know you. Let’s even go one step further, no one in their right business mind will trust their clients to you if you were not “real” with them from the beginning. Would you refer someone your really do not know or trust? I already know your answer.
What I am trying to say is be you. If that means being funny, serious, or quirky embrace it. It is so tempting to be like the blogger that is witty with a great reader base but if that is not who you are, it will not work. Besides that is really who he/she is in real life. That is precisely why it works. Trust me, you will eventually grow tired of pretending to be someone else and in pretending to be someone else, you will lose a part of your true self. Being someone else is hard work; being you is so much easier and fulfilling especially when you accept that you have something to say that only you can say in your unique and authentic way.
When you are being the real you, the true you, only then will you start to make real connections personally and professionally. For the short time we have on this beautiful planet, shouldn’t a part of our joy in life be to make authentic connections with others that not only fulfill us but also accept us as the amazing and unique humans we all are? I already know your answer.
15 Comments
Great advice! Seriously i agree, it’s confusing if someone acts one way online and different in person. So confusing! -)
So true couldn’t have said it better and its lovely to meet like minded people who are genuine, it’s tough with all the noise to stick to our guns. I love that TWIPs encourages this kind of ethos.
Can’t wait for the TWIPS conference hint hint ‘;0)
Beautifully stated! Great words of advice from Naomi and all the comments. Being someone you’re not is truly difficult and I can speak from experience, it takes a toll on your inner spirit. Be who you want to be! My experience was different though, I wasn’t wanting to be different from who I really was, I was being told to be someone I wasn’t and had to realize this was not the healthiest environment for me. That was hard to do and for people to understand, but you need to be true to yourself and others! Thanks Naomi!!
First of all- Welcome back hon! Your US presence was missed! <3 Second, this is perfectly stated and I can't agree with you more. I do have to remind myself sometimes to just be me- even if I get a little "cheesy" on my blog every now and again. Haha, guess I can BE just that every so often. =) I LOVED meeting you in person- and yes, like Alicia you were just how I imagined and more (in a good way- lol). I'm so glad I can say the other TWIPs I've met also met in person have been so genuine and I absolutely love that about this group. =)
Fab advice, true in all aspects of life! I love meeting all the wonderful people I meet online in ‘real’ life because they are exactly like their online persona, and can happily chat away as if we’ve known each other for years! I hope they would all say the same of me! Besides, pretending to be something you’re not is so tiring
LOL Alicia leave it to you to make me laugh my first day back! LOL!
I must say you are exactly who I thought you would be although a tad bit better even! Just a tad, don’t get a big head. Great post and so true! It is easy to hide behind the veil of social media but it can get awkward when that veil is no longer around!
Awesome post and so true! Was just thinking about this the other day. Not only is being true to yourself so much better, but it is also easier! I don’t see how people can be so fake all the time, it must be so stressful to keep all that up!
Naomi, It was amazing to meet you in person,at WMBA Vegas and everything in this POST is so true!!! It is so important to be ourselves all the time, because we create a bond at home with the people we read in their blogs and posts, we already have a picture in our mind of how they are and when we can finally meet them in person, the feeling is AMAZING when you can say you are just how I pictured you in mi mind, and sometimes people may just surprise you in the good way!!! Keep it real its AMAZING to be you!!!
Yes yes YES! I can’t stand seeing people post things online that I KNOW aren’t true about what their doing or who they are. Everything is just so much better if you’re authentic and real!
I totally agree Naomi – it is so important to be true to yourself. I can’t really think of anything else to add to this post as it’s already been said so perfectly. But, if you ever second guess what you are doing {as I just did this past week} – just take a step back – things will fall back into place and you’ll see that by remaining true to yourself it will be ok. And, both brides and vendors really do appreciate that.
I could not agree more with this post. This is something I encourage everyday. It’s so important to be the real you.
Judy Garland once said, “Always be a first rate version of yourself and not a second rate version of someone else.” — which, to me, is such a driving force into today’s world — both online & in person.
I’ve met people who were doing everything and ANYTHING in their power to be someone else. Ive seen others copy – blantly. And Ive sat next to people as they told me it’d be a lot “easier” to be “So-and-So” — anyone from big sister to top name wedding vendor.
We need to realize that there’s a SPECIFIC, DESIGNED reason that we are – each of us – Individuals. There’s a certain “hipness”, it seems, in being unique, and quirky, and a little “against the grain” — but there is MORE power in being AUTHENTIC.
I once wrote in a journal of mine, “Everyone’s TRYING to be different. I just AM.” And it’s always reminded me that I dont have to TRY, I simply have to BE.
When I experience a person, online or in person, who I just get “that vibe” from — you know, the “not-so-authentic-vibe” – I walk away from them. I can’t do it, and I certainly wouldn’t recommend them to ANYONE. My recommendation is my WORD that I “vouche” for this person, company, etc. And I want those people and companies to equally represent themselves as I represent my own name.
Could I be like EVERY other photographer out there? Sure. But, really, there’s NOTHING better than being who I was intended to be…the first rate version of Casie.
I’m a firm believer in everything about this post. Being authentic is truly important in every aspect of your life.:) Love Love Love! Safe travels back to Cali. xo
This is such great advice and it’s completely true!
One of the sweetest compliment I received at a meet up was someone saying to me “your just as cheerful & positive in person as you are on twitter” – Yay! I think allowing yourself to shine through in your online persona is incredibly important to building a strong business! Brides (and other vendors) like to feel as though they know you from your social networking – it’s a simple way to build trust and initiate a potential business relationship (or long term friendship)!
Great post! Love it! Have a great weekend! XO!